NBC News screenshot

Pity Donald Trump’s poor, bedraggled band of so-called “surrogates.” Sean Spicer, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Kellyanne Conway, and the rest try their best, they really do. They get out there and lie and deflect and evade and try to create a narrative about events and facts that is even barely plausible, and then their boss barrels into the room and fucks it all up, over and over again.

Take this whole James Comey firing. For days, the White House had been trying to create a narrative that went something like the following: Trump fired Comey after receiving a recommendation from his attorney general and deputy attorney general that Comey had to go, in large part over his handling of the Hillary Clinton email saga. It was definitely not about anything else!

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It was a totally unbelievable narrative, but the whole crew was sticking to it. Enter the big man. Trump went on NBC News on Thursday and casually tore the whole thing to shreds. The full interview was posted Thursday night, and it is a beauty.

The “firing after receiving recommendations” thing? LOL. “I was going to fire regardless of recommendation,” Trump told Lester Holt. Oh, good to know.

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And what about the reasons for it? Surely Trump would want to emulate his staffers and stay away from any mention of the FBI’s Russia investigation, lest we think its continuation had anything to do with Comey’s ouster?

Sorry, Sean! Your boss must hate you, because he can’t keep his mouth shut (emphasis ours):

And in fact, when I decided to just do it, I said to myself, I said, ‘You know, this Russia thing with Trump and Russia is a made-up story. It’s an excuse by the Democrats for having lost an election that they should have won.

Donald Trump: master of the self-own.

Update, 8:06 AM: LOL.

Truer words...

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UPDATE, 9:13 AM: He is still going, folks!

I mean, yes, this is bad, but also, it’s so good, he’s such a fuckup, it’s amazing.