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A New York City councilmember is proposing to give every tree in the city its own e-mail address, accessible to the public, Gothamist reports.

The e-mails wouldn't be for anything practical, like reporting damage or vandalism. They would just be for communicating with the trees and letting them know how you feel. (Note: trees cannot read or respond to e-mail and have no higher consciousness that has been documented as of publication).

A spokesman for Councilmember Mark Levine told Gothamist the e-mails would be for "deepening public engagement with the trees." (Some trees in the East Village have already had enough public engagement to last several lifetimes.)

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If adopted, New York would be following the lead of the Melbourne, Australia, Urban Forest project. A map on the project's website points out each individual tree in the city, its projected life expectancy, and an e-mail address to send questions, comments and feedback.

Who would e-mail a tree? Lots of people, it seems. The BBC reported earlier this summer that Melbourne trees received more than 3,000 e-mails in the last two years from all over the world. The e-mails quoted by the BBC are overwhelmingly positive, with people pouring out their appreciation for the plants.

Hello Weeping Myrtle,
I'm sitting inside near you and I noticed on the urban tree map you don't have many friends nearby. I think that's sad so I want you to know I'm thinking of you. I also want to thank you for providing oxygen for us to breath in the hustle and bustle of the city.
Best Regards, N

So what will New Yorkers say to trees, given the chance? Based on the current state of communication about trees on social media, it will probably look something like this.

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This tree will eat ur dog if it leaves shit in my west village nabe. Hungry nature. Fucking trees are hostile here pic.twitter.com/4HJyVBqiXf

— Joe Dobias (@JOEDOEchef) November 9, 2015

The trees are waiting with bated breath. (Note: trees do not breathe).